Oh my Morgan Freeman!
Interwebz? Is that you?!
How long has it been? Oh, who cares, you look fantastic! Have you lost weight?
Well, I don’t know what you’re doing but keep it up because damn!
Wait a minute, something’s different. Something…
You met somebody, didn’t you?!
Don’t try to deny it. You’re in love, aren’t you?
Oh, that’s just fantastic! He must be something special because you are GLOWING!
Tell me all about him! How did you meet?
Oooo…those online dating sites can be tricky. The gynecologist who picks you up in a new car every week may turn out to be a valet who does “pelvic exams” out of the back of his van down by the river. You just never know.
What’s that? He’s a web designer? What a fabulous match for you, Interwebz!
I’m so happy you found someone.
That’s just wonderful.
Oh, nothing special. Same old thing, you know, get up, go to work, get coffee for the boss and try not to spit in it, work, work, work, try not to jab a spork in a coworker’s eye who won’t quit singing and humming, work, feed the dogs, try not to cry and drive directly to a shelter to get another 8 or 9 of them every time the SPCA commercial comes on, walk the dogs, sleep, repeat.
What’s the matter? Oh, don’t worry, I’m fine. Just stuck in a bit of a rut.
I have, however, rekindled my love of needle felting, so that’s good. I don’t know why I ever stopped; I mean the whole process is basically a repeated stabbing motion. It’s very cathartic.
But yeah, yeah. I’m good. I’m good. Reeeaaallly good.
*looks at wrist with no watch*
I should run. I’ve got, you know, wool to stab and…stuff.
Well, it was great to see you.
Absolutely, we should get together sometime soon!
Just give me a call!
I’m always around.
Always around and waiting.
Waiting, waiting, waiting…
So. Right. Well, see you soon then.
*yelling over shoulder*
And you tell that web designer of yours he better treat you right or I’ll give him a virus!
*still yelling and walking*
I mean, not GIVE him a virus, but you know…
*sees the Interwebz look away and walk faster*
Ok. Ok then.